“Find your joy,” Elizabeth says to our 12-year-old son Alex before every baseball practice and game.

As a former D1 athlete and CEO of one of the region’s largest non-profits, Elizabeth knows people, especially young athletes, are at their best when they are loose and happy. 

Young baseball players who find their joy - and the confidence that comes with it - tend to separate themselves from their peers. The mental side of the game is a constant challenge for players at all levels. The pressure proves to be too much for most kids – the majority of whom quit youth sports by the time they turn 13. Adults often are cited as the reason why.

“Adults behaving badly at kid’s sports games is nothing new. In fact, adults have invaded the games in many ways and ruined them,” is how an ABC News anchor recently introduced a story about coaches storming a field to accuse an 11-year-old of being too old to compete. “Message to grownups: it’s their game, not yours!”

If your son or daughter plays baseball or wants to, this episode of Dear San Diego is for you. Host Tony Manolatos discusses all that’s right and wrong with Little League and Travel Baseball. Tony’s wife, Elizabeth Wilberg, and their 12-year-old twin boys, Alex and Nicky, join him on this episode – and their takes are fire!

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🚨LEAN IN 👉🏻 Subscribe to Baseball Dad & PR Guy, Tony’s new Substack, and join our FB Group, Travel Baseball Moms & Dads. We’re building a thoughtful community for parents, coaches, and others who love the game.

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If you haven’t listened to our first podcast covering youth baseball do so now: Youth Baseball Parents: Stop Talking!

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Little Leagues are volunteer-run organizations, Tony points out on this new episode of Dear San Diego. At their best, they bring joy to kids, boost their confidence and teach them life skills. But these leagues also can bring out the worst in some adults, and there’s little to no oversight of the people in charge. It’s easy to spot the board members, managers, coaches and parents who carry the most sway and operate by a different set of rules than everyone else, Tony says. Know that going in, and limit your expectations.

Travel baseball has its own set of highs and lows, but there’s far less politics and drama, Tony and Elizabeth both say. Board influence is minimal to nonexistent, the best organizations keep dads out of the dugout, and the level of play is generally better. 

Too many kids playing travel ball for neighborhood teams, which Tony recommends for kids starting out, have diluted the experience. But the older divisions and stronger travel organizations focused on player development give parents fantastic views of the game and a look at what it’s like at the next levels: high school and college. 

Learning, developing and staying healthy should be your primary goals, Tony tells parents. Also, don’t forget about the larger play: baseball teaches kids life skills. But don’t overdo it, avoid money grabs and be leery of anyone telling you your son needs to play baseball year-round. When you hear that, follow the money and remember the value and balance other sports bring, not to mention the athleticism you typically see in multi-sport athletes.

“I like travel ball…but it can be a little bit hard on a family,” Elizabeth says on the podcast. “And I think it can sometimes put pressure on the player because they know the family has invested a lot of resources, not only money, but time. So there is heightened pressure for them to perform at a certain level. 

“We've played with a few travel ball teams and I think Alex has improved with every one and he's had some really great coaching and the team that he's on now, I'm just so happy with the coaching. It's so straightforward. It's practical. Matter of fact. It's empowering,” Elizabeth said.

“I've seen coaching both in travel ball and Little League, and I think there's a major opportunity in Little League: these coaches don't get any leadership training. And it is such a missed opportunity because most anyone who's been in a leadership position knows how to motivate people, and it's not by yelling at them or belittling them,” she said.

“It's about empowering them and building their confidence and building their skills. And so I think that leadership training could be great to add to the process of onboarding coaches, both in Little League and in travel ball.”

Tune in now to hear more about youth baseball, confidence building and a long list of resources for parents and players.

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